All Hail Your Pro Lord of Crastination

Orgasm

(Source: matthewsmiths, via chunkycreeperprincess)

Notes

12710

Posted

3 hours ago

When you’re the only one in English class who understands Shakespeare but you don’t want to take over the class discussion

whatshouldtheatrecallme:

You’re like

That would be the Swiss

(Source: ib-memes)

universalsymbolof asked: VEGGIESAND I'M STARTING THAT TODAYBUT I'M GETTING REALLY HUNGRYAND THOSE COOKIES LOOK SUBLIMEFINE, I'LL HAVE JUST ONE OR TWO OR TENWHY NOT ITS NOT A CRIMEWE'RE PROCRASTINATINGNO BETTER WAY THAN EATINGCAUSE NOTHING ELSE COULD POSSIBLYCOMPAREI'M PROCRASTINATINGIT'S REALLY FASCINATINGI KNOW THERE'S WORK TO DOBUT I DON'T CAREI SHOULD PROBABLY DO MY LAUNDRYI SHOULD PROBABLY FEED THE CATBUT RIGHT NOW WE'RE PLAYING HALOYOLO! HEADSHOT! MMH TAKE THAT!YOU SHOULD PROBABLY CALL

Answer:

I WOULD TELL YOU TO PROCRASTINATE TO BUT WHEN I WAS IN MY INTERSHIP FOR PROCRASTINATING WIZARDRY INC THE ONLY CONSULTING DETECTIVE THERE TOLD ME THAT ONE DAY I’D MEET A GIRL WHOSE NAME WOULD BE A LITERARY STYLISTIC DEVICE AND I ASKED HIM WHAT ABOUT THE ORANGUTANGUS BEHIND MY BIOLOGY BOOK AND HE SAID NOTHING SO I YELLED BIOLO AND THAT’S THE STORY OF HOW I STARTED STUDYING

Posted

4 days ago

universalsymbolof asked: A DOCTORNEVERMIND IT'S JUST A SCRATCHBUT YOUR ARM'S GONE! IT'S A FLESH WOUND!NOW COME ON LET'S PLAY SOME CATCHI HAVE ORGANIZED MY DESK TOPNOW I'M ALL SET UP TO WORKWAIT THAT PICTURE'S KINDA CROOKEDAND IT'S DRIVING ME BESERKNOW I MIGHT AS WELL JUST COLOR CODEMY PENCILS ONE BY ONEAND MY PAPERS AND MY FILESI CAN'T WORK UNTIL IT'S DONEWE'RE PROCRASTINATINGALL DAY I SIT HERE WAITINGFOR JUST THE PERFECT MOMENT TO BEGIN

Answer:

BUT WHAT IF WHAT THEY TOLD US ABOUT THE TREE CLIMBING GIRAFFES IS WRONG? IT’S ALL LIES THEY ONLY HUG THE TREES AND THEN THE CUPCAKES GET BURNT AND ADULTS FORCE THEIR NEPHEWS TO EAT THEM AND THEY WONDER THROUGH THE FOREST AND FIND A MAGICAL TALKING IB INVIGILATOR WHO TELLS THEM TO STOP DOING DRUGS SO THEY HIT THEM WITH A TANK OF OXYGEN